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Prepared Pokémon Dishes For PETA

By Kevin on Oct 09 2012 02:21 AM
For starters (a much-intended, multi-purpose pun), I'm not too thrilled about PETA's recent attacks on Nintendo over the past year. Ever since they launched their Mario Kills Tanooki campaign nearly a year ago, I've been picking PETA particles from my teeth and washing them down with tall glasses of whole cow's milk. "Moooooooooo!" No matter how much milk I drink, I just can't seem to rid the awful aftertaste that PETA leaves in my mouth.

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Now, with their newly launched Flash-based game, titled Pokémon Black & Blue: Gotta Free 'em All!, a spoof to the incredibly popular Pokémon Black Version and Pokémon White Version video games, I believe they've gone too far. Yes, yes, Pokémon consists of fictitious animals that are trained by humans. We get that, but they're unquestionably making inaccurate comparisons to real-life events and situations.

Ultimately, they're sending the wrong message to other PETA followers and supporters that are completely oblivious to the world of Pokémon, what it stands for and how it can benefit others.

Here are a few of the ways that PETA are comparing animal cruelty to Pokémon, a family-friendly video game franchise that has been going strong for more than sixteen years and making a positive influence worldwide.

PETA.org said:

The amount of time that Pokémon spend stuffed in pokéballs is akin to how elephants are chained up in train carts, waiting to be let out to "perform" in circuses. But the difference between real life and this fictional world full of organized animal fighting is that Pokémon games paint rosy pictures of things that are actually horrible.

PETA.org said:

If PETA existed in Unova, our motto would be: Pokémon are not ours to use or abuse. They exist for their own reasons. We believe that this is the message that should be sent to children. —Team PETA

PETA.org said:

For generations, Pokémon have suffered at the hands of their cruel trainers. Help PETA free Pikachu and his Pokémon friends as they struggle for Pokémon liberation!

From their sordid slander, to the millions of dollars they spend on false advertising, it's time they get a taste of their own medicine. "I choose you, Pokémon fans!"

In recognition of PETA's new Pokémon spoof, we're celebrating all the wonderful ways to eat our Pokémon. If you need a handy list of all available Pokémon, use this:

Below, is a list of different styles of prepared Pokémon dishes. How many can we come up with? The entries, generated from this post, will all be used to regularly update the various dishes in this article.
  • Tempura Tepig
  • Fried Psyduck
  • Cloyster with lemon
  • Battered Bulbasaur
  • Doduo with potatoes
  • Succulent Squirtle
  • Tauros Big Mac
  • Sautéed Vileplume
  • Suicune Salad
  • HO-OH Spicy Wings
  • Poached Pidgey with Bulbasauce
  • Politoed Legs
  • Flygon Fries
  • Charbroiled Charmander
  • Roasted Grumpig
  • Roasted Farfetch served with leak
  • Exeggutor Eggs
  • Chancey Softboil
  • Quilava Quesadillas
  • Torkel Soup
  • Ditto Custard
  • Tangela Spaghetti
  • Stuffed Scraggy Bites
  • Fried Dialga Steak
  • Jigglypuff Jell-O
  • Steamed Cloysters
  • Oshawott Club Soda
  • Gogoat Cheese

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Comments: 10

This is pretty funny.  I'll take some stuffed scraggy bites.  Gotta eat em all... Pokemon. Mmmmmmm!
Yum!  A Tauros Big Mac sounds yummy, with a side of Suicune salad....LMAO!!
I am agianst abusing  animals and belive that people should not abuse there pets but I do find this to be a funny article. hmm lets see how about some fried Dialga steaks.......
What no Jigglypuff Jello?
I'm silently laughing about the Farfetch'd one cause Farfetch'd are endangered for getting eaten by people all the time.

PETA needs to have a campaign against carnivorous Pokemon also, if they want to get technical. Pidgeot eat Weedles and Caterpies all the time.
Steamed Cloysters with a few slices of PETA bread!

Kevin, on 10 October 2012 - 06:11 AM, said:

Steamed Cloysters with a few slices of PETA bread!
I see what you did there, bonus points!
Ditto custard ^_^
Skitty noodle soup! (a specialty in china!!)
Oshowatt Club Soda.
I hope you all didn't think this topic would be put on "the back burner!"

Gogoat cheese!